The Relevancy of Age

We are asked daily to input our date of birth; in the doctors office, signing up for a subscription online, applying for a credit card. We are asked just as often how old we are by new friends and acquaintances, co-workers, bartenders and bouncers. I find myself asking the question - How much does age matter?

For many things that require an age it is simply for legal backing. The law has stipulated that the same men who can die for their country cannot concurrently indulge in a beer or even a glass of whiskey to help wash away the thought of death from their mind. A cliche' analogy there, but yet a real truism that deserves attention. The law decides that people under 21 are not responsible enough to enter and leave a bar intoxicated. In Pennsylvania studies have shown that nearly 70% of drunk driving fatalities occurred within the ages of 21-30, not within 18-21. At 21, people decide they have reached the age of being reckless.

Age seems to be more of a hindrance on society, not only with drinking, but more importantly with love and relationships. I may be biased here coming from a divorce situation where a mother and father of the same age remarried 14 years older and 9 years younger respectively. They both appear happier, more content, more in love. When a man of 25 dates a girl at the age of 20, its deemed "not socially acceptable," by many people. Why? At what point does a girl or a guy reach the maturity level in which they can comfortably date someone more than 5, 10, or 15 years older than they are? Should there be dating laws to go along with sexual encounter laws?

When is a person old? Is it relative? Relative to what? Health, appearance, grey hairs, speech, education? These are all questions that come to mind when thinking about the ever perplexing concept of age, merely a number of years that you have existed on a planet.

I was watching a TED talk the other day talking about juvenile delinquency and its correlation to those on death row. 80% of men on death row spent time in a juvenile delinquency center or were incarcerated at some point. The speaker, David R. Dow,  talked about a young boy who had witnessed his father being shot, was chased through his home by his deranged mother with a butcher knife, beaten in two different foster homes, and eventually imprisoned. He was 14 at this time. At 14, he was older than me in experience.

Allow me to deviate from a piece of thought provoking prose into an op ed to conclude this entry. I would like to propose that I do not believe age does matter at all. Levels of maturity do, experience does, education does as well. In our society we are so keen on measuring things, age is just another measurement, and it is the simplest measurement for gauging someones ability to coexist, and match up against others. Next time I go to the bar I would rather the bouncer pull up my resume, my dating record, and then arm wrestle me to decide if I am an eligible patron for their establishment.

My parents relationships work....now. My birth mother and fathers relationship did NOT work when they were together, and age, along with many other things was a factor. At the time of their divorce they were at completely different ages, yet their birthday never changed. Why is that? Age is not a good indicator for how "old" someone is. For me, the world is for the most part in order.  Stipulations and public biases throw it off its axis.